Ron Sparks Author, Poet

He Said: Is She Using Her Pregnancy to Get Out of Dirty Chores?


(note:  this whole blog is tongue-in-cheek and not meant to be taken seriously)

Everyone knows I am giddy with happiness.  My wife is pregnant and we’re going to have a baby.  I am ready and willing to help and assist in any way I can.  I have been waiting on my lovely wife hand and foot since we found out last week she is pregnant.

Still, I have to wonder how much of her lethargy and morning sickness is psychosomatic and not physiological.

Since she found out she is pregnant she is sleeping like a zillion hour s a day.  Don’t get me wrong, Carey has always been a power-sleeper, but now she has license to sleep and no guilt to go along with it.  It’s NAP ON for her now.

But that’s not what I am blogging about today.  Today I am blogging about a particular incident.  I have no doubts that Carey has a lot of morning sickness.  In the morning.  In the afternoon.  In the evening.  It’s almost constant for her.

So yesterday morning we woke up to find out our beagle, Cassie, had suffered from a bout of explosive diarrhea in her crate the night before.  Carey took one look at the mess and literally ran out the door, outside in the driveway, in her pajamas, and started making all sorts of god-awful gagging, dry-heaving, sounds.

She refused to come back in until I had cleaned the mess, mopped the floor, washed the crate, bathed the dog, and restored the house to its normal “smell.”  She stood in the driveway, hair all askew, in her Smurfette Underoos, and waited for me to clean the mess.

And she blames it on the baby.   I’m not finding it odd that she gagged and couldn’t handle the cleanup.  I’m just not sure it has anything to do with the pregnancy.  I think she now has a reason to justify her weak stomach!

Her excuse now trumps whatever excuse I can come up with so I am forced to do all the dirty work she doesn’t want to do!  All she has to do is blame it on the baby and I am pretty much stuck.  How do you top that?

It’s not fair, I say!

About the author

Ron Sparks

Ron Sparks is a technology professional, science fiction and fantasy author and poet living in Zurich, Switzerland. His latest book "ONI: Satellite Earth Series Book 1" is available on

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  • HAHA—I would say that if a woman stands outside with her hair all askew and in her jammys for all the world to see, it’s definitely for a good reason. LOL

    I nearly throw up myself when I have to clean up puke from my cat (my husband REFUSES) and he won’t clean the litter box either! I just take a deep breath before going in for the clean up!!

    Good luck!! You have a little while longer. 😛 Then it’s baby puke and poo!!

  • I’m afraid you’ll have to carry the cross as Carey is carrying her own…whatever it may be. Knowing Carey and how she dotes on you I think waht she says and does is true. Love you both.

  • Congrats Ron!

    You will not have ANY excuse that comes close to hers. I came to that conclusion within a week of when we found out my wife was pregnant. Suck it up.

    Just think of life after the baby is born. When the little one wakes up at 3am hungry, SHE can take care of the baby. If she is breastfeeding, you have a ticket to sleep for several months. If the baby is bottle fed, oh well. Suck it up.

    Congrats my friend!

Ron Sparks Author, Poet

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Ron Sparks

Ron Sparks is a technology professional, science fiction and fantasy author and poet living in Zurich, Switzerland. His latest book "ONI: Satellite Earth Series Book 1" is available on


A man of many passions, I lay claim to a myriad of interests and hobbies. Among them, I am an amateur astronomer, an avid motorcycle rider, a whiskey aficionado, a (poor) surfer, a scuba diver, a martial artist, a student of philosophy, a proponent of critical thinking, a technologist, an entrepreneur, a cancer survivor, and I harbor a lifelong love of science fiction and fantasy. Feel free to strike up a conversation on the social networks below.

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